I saw the sunrise as a magnificent welcome to the day…

I realized that I had been living by rules that weren’t mine,

I didn’t fit in the confines that had been decided for me,

But I wanted love and approval,

So to move from those confines,

Caused me pain and rejection.

I stayed in the learned helplessness,

Rebelling at times,

To test the waters,

Always returning to the comfort of my conditioning,

When the hurdles got too high.

One day the Universe decided,

I had still not learnt my lesson,

So hit me with a big one,

One that completely knocked me down.

At last, I finally took notice,

The way I was existing,

Had nearly wiped me out.

I started to take responsibility for my life,

Stopped blaming,

My parents,

My partner,

The traffic,

And the state of the world.

When I Began to Live

I decided to listen to the signals from my heart,

The ones I had so often ignored,

The ones I didn’t trust,

Because I didn’t know what was best for me,

My significant others did,

Making it known everyday.

I realized that it was OK,

To cry, to laugh, to feel fear,

I was born with emotions that were there to be expressed.

If I felt the pain of grief it would leave and never return,

Laughter would fill my soul with joy,

And fear would dissipate and I’d grow strong.

When I Began to Live

I took more time for me,

I rested when I felt weary,

Took more moonlight swims,

Used the ‘best’ china,

And dressed in fabulous clothes,

I went on the daring adventure that I had always dreamt about,

Gave more time to my family

And lived each day to the brim.

I realized that when I decided to do ‘something’,

I REALLY could do it.

I set my goal,

Believed before I saw,

Worked on my task,

Felt the emotion of my journey,

And created my future.

When I Began to Live

I surrounded myself with great friends,

That supported and cared.

I learnt to trust my feelings about the human race,

I learnt that positive people were best for my health,

And that negatives ones may just need a little help,

So when my life is nearly over,

And I’m looking back on what I’ve done,

I won’t be looking back on what I had,

But who was next to me,

And who believed in me,

And how I felt inside,

When I Began to Live.

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'When I Began to Live'

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